“It’s not personal. It’s just business.” I think this is one of the least productive things ever said. Life is short and we spend most of it at work, so it’s definitely personal. Work has been compared to a totalitarian regime. We are told when to be there and when to leave, what to do, […]
EXECUTION IS EVERYTHING
It’s fun to research, assemble, and try out your own personal bag of tricks to be applied to relationship and career issues. I love finding new rules, maxims, and tools to consider. However, you do run a risk when you find new practices to try. If you try something once and it works, there is […]
BURNING BRIDGES EFFECTIVELY
We’ve been told that burning bridges is not wise. This refers to irreparably harming key relationships and opportunities as a part of a rough and hasty exit from a difficult situation. This can be accomplished by unexpectedly abandoning your responsibilities, intentionally damaging work products, treating key people with whom you work negatively and harshly, etc. […]
THANK YOU, FERRIS
[I am about to launch my latest book The Ten Delusions, but I’ve already jump-started work on the next book too. It’s called Live Hard. It’s intended to be inspiration for living more fully, thinking outside the box, taking principled risks, etc. One possible story I’m working on for the book, draft below, deals with […]
STOP ASKING, “WHAT DO YOU DO?”
I’m as guilty as anyone, but this isn’t a great lead question. You’re networking, you don’t know the person, so you say, “What do you do?” It’s innocent, but not ideal. Every person who is asked this question feels narrowly defined by one particular label. You’re an accountant, an executive, a software engineer. We are […]
THE CASE FOR AUTHENTICITY
[This is part two of a five-part series addressing aspects of authenticity. A version of this article appeared in The Guru Book, edited by Jonathan Low.] For many years there has been a lot of talk about the essence of leadership. Thinkers of all varieties have offered up their list of basic elements, forgotten secrets, and magic […]
DANCE ANYWAY
Some people spend a lifetime trying to fit in. I understand. I tried for a while when I was young. What I eventually discovered is that fitting in precludes you from being fully you. Don’t get me wrong, whether young or old, I understand the social benefits of fitting in. They include more friends, moments of affirmation, more status, and […]
CHASING PURPOSE
There are two somewhat related interpretations of the word purpose as it relates to careers. One is about finding your calling, or what I often call career “fit.” This refers to figuring out what you’re supposed to be doing with your life, given your interests, abilities, personality, etc. The other use of the word refers to a […]
REFLECTING > LISTENING > TALKING
Everyone talks about how listening is more important than talking for conversation effectiveness and for building rapport and understanding. They are correct. While interacting with others, most of us are wired to fill the air with words. Say something. Show what you know. Manage impressions. Coach them, teach them, or otherwise be helpful. This becomes […]
THE TEN DELUSIONS
And Other Brutal Relationship Realities: The Book of Relationship Answers Only a Divorcé Could Write Below is a draft TOC for my next book. It is intended to be a simple, blunt, snarky, and honest take on relationships. Since I believe that professional relationships are often very similar to personal relationships, it’s worth sharing this […]
