I’m as guilty as anyone, but this isn’t a great lead question. You’re networking, you don’t know the person, so you say, “What do you do?” It’s innocent, but not ideal. Every person who is asked this question feels narrowly defined by one particular label. You’re an accountant, an executive, a software engineer. We are […]
THE CASE FOR AUTHENTICITY
[This is part two of a five-part series addressing aspects of authenticity. A version of this article appeared in The Guru Book, edited by Jonathan Low.] For many years there has been a lot of talk about the essence of leadership. Thinkers of all varieties have offered up their list of basic elements, forgotten secrets, and magic […]
DANCE ANYWAY
Some people spend a lifetime trying to fit in. I understand. I tried for a while when I was young. What I eventually discovered is that fitting in precludes you from being fully you. Don’t get me wrong, whether young or old, I understand the social benefits of fitting in. They include more friends, moments of affirmation, more status, and […]
CHASING PURPOSE
There are two somewhat related interpretations of the word purpose as it relates to careers. One is about finding your calling, or what I often call career “fit.” This refers to figuring out what you’re supposed to be doing with your life, given your interests, abilities, personality, etc. The other use of the word refers to a […]
REFLECTING > LISTENING > TALKING
Everyone talks about how listening is more important than talking for conversation effectiveness and for building rapport and understanding. They are correct. While interacting with others, most of us are wired to fill the air with words. Say something. Show what you know. Manage impressions. Coach them, teach them, or otherwise be helpful. This becomes […]
THE TEN DELUSIONS
And Other Brutal Relationship Realities: The Book of Relationship Answers Only a Divorcé Could Write Below is a draft TOC for my next book. It is intended to be a simple, blunt, snarky, and honest take on relationships. Since I believe that professional relationships are often very similar to personal relationships, it’s worth sharing this […]
BEHIND THE SMILE
A friend of mine posted this quote the other day, “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about.” Versions of this have been attributed to many people. Regardless the author, the advice is sound. You never know what it might be: marriage difficulties, health problems, financial issues, a broken […]
THREE LEVELS OF BRAVERY
Bravery is defined by Merriam-Webster as having or showing courage. As I think about that definition, it occurs to me that when applied to beliefs and opinions there are levels of bravery. Level one is being brave enough to be honest with yourself. Brave enough to stop avoiding the truth. Just admit it: You’re a […]
